Happy Valentine’s Day & other reflections

I’m in a sentimental mood — not because it’s the week of Valentine’s and my birthday (I like to celebrate all week) or maybe because it is.  I met with an extraordinary woman yesterday who’s with a non-profit helping people affected by trauma. Her story is compelling, and moving, and real – and she’s beautiful for sharing it.  She believes in the power of yoga for healing, just like I do. (More updates on yogaServe coming soon.)

I’ve also had countless friends and loved ones demonstrate so much love and kindness this week – by coming out for birthday events, sending messages or cards, or helping or offering to help with our new house.

Love is the amount of sandpapering my mother did to that gross green wall.

Or the perfectly rolled black paint that my Dad managed to NOT get anywhere on his sleeve.

Love is my husband planning a party and not telling me, and buying me bath salts because we now have a bathtub – finally, after three miserable years without one – which becomes a necessity from sore shoulders and rhomboids and tweaked necks (hazards of painting).

And it’s how firmly my friends have stood by my side, have demonstrated kindness and thoughtfulness and support. Thursday night as I drank (probably too much) champagne in celebration of our new home, I was so flooded with gratitude for all this. Gratitude, in part, because for so many years I moved from one thing to the next and didn’t place a priority on building community. I realize now that having this community is more important to me than just about anything else.

I’m feeling sentimental for this, and for other reasons. Being around those that love you is such a powerful reminder that who you are is good enough. You are you. And that’s all you need to be. To me this is what Valentine’s is about: love, and self-love. If the people you spend time around do not remind you often enough that you are wondrous and wonderful and beautiful and sacred and so good at being you, then you are hanging around the wrong people. If you don’t believe this about yourself, that breaks my heart. My heart’s been breaking on that front a lot lately. I don’t always know how to articulate that. Be patient with me as I’m imperfect.

On another note- this week has taken a heavy toll on me. This makes me laugh. I’m an infant in the homeownership world and I don’t want to start complaining. But I’m TIRED already – haha. I took today off work. There’s something about the smell of paint and scouring powder and vinegar that reminds me of all the home renovations my parents did – which was infinitely more work than what’s before me and Mike – but my bones feel tired even in remembrance of all that work. No complaints. I said at the outset this blog isn’t about complaints.

I’m excited to be posting pictures soon (before/after) and sharing more on that front. For now, I sleep and dream in shades of green (psychologically I’m sure there’s some explanation for why I want everything in my house to be that color) and am still coughing up sandpaper dust.

What a good week.